A lost post

Romans 1:8

“Indeed I give thanks first to the God of me through Jesus Christ on behalf of all of you because the faith of you is being announced in the whole world.”

What’s interesting here is the cause or reason for Paul’s giving thanks. The conjunction “because” is dependent on the context. It is expressing the reason for something. Paul is thankful that the faith of them is being announced in the whole world.

Faith. This is a concept that I am only just beginning to grasp. Pistos (faith) comes from the word peitho (to persuade). I wrote previously about faith (being persuaded) that God will do and act according to what He has promised. It is all God, saying something, and doing it, exactly the time and place and way He intended to do it. The Spirit of God gives us the faith to believe that He will do it. That is faith-being persuaded. Faith is the presence and activity of God’s Spirit, NOT the believer’s works. Galatians 5:22……….. Faith is, being persuaded by God. I think of the old hymn:
“But I know whom I have believed,
And am persuaded that He is able
To keep that which I’ve committed
Unto Him against that day”

Is being announced. This is a great word!! Katangelos is the word angelos (a messenger, or angel) with the prefix kata (a preposition meaning according to, after or against.). Actually, this is interesting because, when you put certain prepositions in front of this word, it changes the meaning. For example, if you put the preposition pro in front of angelos, the word means “to announce beforehand”. The preposition ana in front of the same word changes the meaning to “to bring back news”. Our preposition kata, makes the word mean “to spread out news, up and down”. Paul is saying that the Roman’s faith was being announced throughout the whole world. It was spreading, like a first century facebook message, or tabloid headline. I hear excitement and wonder in Paul’s tone.

The phrase that Paul uses here, “ in the whole world” is a hyperbolic statement. Paul uses them occasionally, and they were very common to ancient Romans and Jews. A hyperbolic statement is an exaggerated phrase or colloquialism. When someone is overweight, a hyperbolic statement would be, they are “bigger than a house”.


Romans 1:9

“For the witness of me is the God whom I serve in the spirit of me, in the gospel of the son of Him.”

Previously we looked at how Paul referred to himself as a slave to Christ (vs.1). When Paul makes reference to “the God whom I serve”, he does not use the same Greek word dulos (slave), but rather the word patris (meaning to serve; to hire for public service). In the New Testament, the word patris is always used to make reference to religious service, specifically, the function of the priest.

The last part of the verse is two prepositional phrases, which I find extremely fascinating. The first is, “in the spirit of me”. This is the preposition en which is in the dative case, signifying location, or sphere. Paul is going out of his way to point out the fact that this “service” is taking place, not in his flesh, but in his spirit! This was revolutionary for the Jewish community, for the Hellenistic Jews, and for the Gentiles. Can you imagine a religion that is not based on works? I doubt they could have.

John 4:23-24 says, “But the hour is coming and now is, when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth; for the Father is seeking such to worship Him. God is Spirit, and those who worship Him must worship in spirit and truth.” The word worship means "to bow down and kiss the hand". It is an act of submission. Or should I say, it is a heart attitude made manifest in worship.

John 3:6, “That which is born of the flesh is flesh, and that which is born of the Spirit is spirit.” God’s spirit is the only on that produces spiritual things. Flesh can only produce flesh. Spirit can only produce spirit. That’s why Jesus’ words to Nicodemus were so revolutionary. We are physically born of the flesh in the flesh. The only way we can be born of the spirit is in and by the Spirit!!

Philippians 3:3, “For we are the circumcision, who worship God in the Spirit, rejoice in Christ Jesus, and have no confidence in the flesh…”. The emphasis here is on the spiritual “religion”, not the fleshly religiosity produced by man’s efforts.

The next phrase, “in the gospel of the son of Him” give us Paul’s area of service. The gospel is all about Jesus, the Son of God. It is not about us. Not about Satan, Not about bad things happening to good people or good things happening to bad people. Not about our worth in Christ. The gospel, the good news is Christ. Him crucified and risen. Everything Paul does and says is only within the confines of Christ. The gospel is the tabernacle in which he serves as a priest.

As believers, everything important and substantial happens in our spirit. It is where the Spirit dwells and functions. Because of His work in our spirit, we have a holy calling to serve within the gospel of Christ. What does that look like? Is it like an electric collar that zaps us every time we step out of the perimeter of the gospel and into the ugly world? No. Look at Paul’s life. He was a tentmaker. He worked for a living, but he was always functioning (in his spirit) under the influence of the gospel of Christ.

Oh, I wish I were so propelled, in every menial task, by such a deep and strong love for the gospel, that it all counted for eternity and nothing would be burned up (like wood, hay, and stubble. see 1 Cor.3: 12-15)!!! God, raise up your Spirit in my spirit, to love, joy, and peace!!!

The Law and Dressing a Chicken

Matthew 5:17-20: “Do not think that I came to abolish the Law or the Prophets; I did not come to abolish but to fulfill. For truly I say to you, until heaven and earth pass away, not the smallest letter or stroke shall pass from the Law until all is accomplished. Whoever then annuls one of the least of these commandments, and teaches others to do the same, shall be called least in the kingdom of heaven; but whoever keeps and teadhes them, he shall be called great in the kingdom of heaven. For I say to you that unless your righteousness surpasses that of the scribes and Pharisees, you will not enter the kingdom of heaven.”

We are studying through the book of Matthew and this week we were discussing what Jesus said in chapter 5:17-20. Particularly the portion where Jesus said He came not to abolish the law, but to fulfill it. Discussion abounded on this point and we were all wrestling to understand what exactly that meant. Just what was the Israelite perception of “the law”? What was Jesus talking about when he referred to the law? One thing is for certain; He was not referring to the volumes of laws the Pharisees added to Leviticus, Numbers, and Deuteronomy.

I remember capturing a glimpse of this while teaching my kids. Many years ago we were reading and studying through Matthew in our Bible lessons. We were talking through the Beatitudes, what it meant to be salt and light, and this portion about Jesus and His relation to the Law. Coincidentally, one of the children was reading a second grade reader called Amelia Bedelia. In the book, the protagonist Amelia is characterized by taking people literally, leading her into some very humorous predicaments. One scene in particular, Amelia was told by her employer to dress the chicken for dinner. Amelia got lace and thread and fabric and made clothes for the chicken.

While reading through Matthew and discussing the Pharisees’ love and worship of the law the picture of Amelia Bedelia dressing the chicken came to my mind. The chicken represents the law. The Pharisees spent years dressing their chickens. They made such elaborate outfits with so many embellishments that after awhile you couldn’t even recognize the chicken underneath all the bling. Not only that but the whole purpose of the chicken was overlooked. It was intended for dinner, not adorning. Jesus comes, and in this section of Matthew, He takes off the embellishments and adornments, sticks His hand in the chicken, pulls out the entrails, and begins to skin it. Now the chicken is laid bare exposed and naked ready, for its purpose. And it is shocking to those who worshipped the dressed up chicken. I know the analogy is not the greatest, and at some point, it breaks down, but for our purposes, it was the amount of Truth that we could digest at the time.

It reminds me of Romans 1:25. “For they exchanged the truth of God for a lie, and worshiped and served the creature rather than the Creator, who is blessed forever. Amen”

Legacy - part 3

Event #3 – Enrolling our remaining two children in traditional school.

I know in my head irrefutably that God is good and altogether righteous. I know experientially that God is good, although sometimes, in His first few chess moves, it may not appear to be so. After 20 years of homeschooling, our first child was out of the house, thriving in collegiate life and growing in Christ. Our second child would be moving out of the house for her continuing college education in the fall, with our blessing and bright hopes for her. Only two remained at home. As was our custom every summer, we began to submit our plans for our family to God in prayer, and ask Him how we would best honor Him that year. For the past 19 years, we had felt the conviction of the Lord to homeschool.

Last year, the Lord directed us to enroll our third child in a traditional Christian school. That was a major change for our family, and though we didn’t see it at first, the benefits and lessons learned were life-changing. Usually growth is hard, and hard is what we experienced, but also great peace and assurance that God was working all things together for the good of those who love Him and are called according to His purposes. We learned, once again, that God’s purposes are not necessarily on our radar.

As we began to prepare for the next year, God began to nudge us in the direction of public charter school. We kept asking Him, “Are you sure?”, and He kept confirming. One of the many ways we knew this was from God was that, outside of an engraved invitation from God, Dave would not consider public education. That was said tongue-in-cheek, since our desire was to remain open to God’s leading, no matter where it lead, but when you do something for 19 years you begin to think that you will do it for the long haul. We prayed, did our research, and decided to enroll our two youngest in the local public charter school.

Everyone asked me what I would do with all of my “free time” now. The truth was, I didn’t know. Since the beginning of our marriage, I had always had children to take care of (well, at the beginning I was working so Dave could finish school) and teach. Now, without leading a bible study, or leading worship, I couldn’t begin to fathom what my life would look like without having my kids at home overseeing their education.

One thing I knew was that Dave wanted and needed me to be more involved in our business. And as the Lord was working out in me what it was to be united with Dave in Christ and to reflect the relationship of the church to Christ, the head, this was something that I knew I needed to do. I laughed upon reflection of my youthful expectations entering marriage. Never had I desired or imagined myself to be involved in business. Business law, accounting, marketing, business development and strategy…this was all so foreign and unsavory to my creative and analytical brain.

So I jumped in. Well, rather reluctantly, I dipped my toes in first and then slowly eased myself in.

We would start the day with an early run (or walk, when my knee was acting up from a tennis injury). Dave would go over the plans for the day, and we would pray together. I would get breakfast and the kids ready for the day. Dave would drop them at school and I would clean up, spend some time in The Word and conversation with Jesus, take a shower, and head into the office. Throughout the day Dave would share with me his plans and visions for the company or a project he was working on. I was gaining such a deep respect for Dave and the abilities God had produced in Him to run this company. Dave approaches business in such an unworldly way. His love for the Lord and desire to serve Him and others bleeds through everything he does and says.

God was giving me such great admiration for the treasure that my husband is. What a unique and godly masterpiece God was producing in Him! The vision and wisdom, passion and humility, conviction and steadfastness are the perfect blend for a leader in such a time and place as this. What I was seeing, was that by coming alongside my husband at work, helping him with various tasks, talking through problems with him, listening as he brainstorms and dreams, keeping him on track when his brain is so overloaded he forgets what he is doing, was exactly the best help I could be to him. God has richly blessed our business and we hold it in an open hand, as an offering to Him to do with as He pleases. May it bring great glory to Him and expansion to the kingdom of God.

Confirmation came quite unexpectedly at dinner a few weeks ago. It is a regular custom of ours to ask a question at the dinner table that each family member answers. On this particular night the question was, “How has God surprised you lately?” All of the answers were good, and I was praising God for His faithfulness to Himself, and thanking Him for His kindness to our family. It was Dave’s turn to answer the question and he said something to the effect that he was surprised at how full and sweet and precious our marriage is to him. He said that in the last few months he has felt such unity and support and oneness with me. He was surprised that our marriage could be this good. He was merrily mystified that we could work so well together and enjoy each other so much. I was humbled. My Savior is so kind and faithful in His gentling this stubborn stallion! Oh may I never stop learning and growing in my love for and knowledge of the One who is so infinitely wise and wonderful.


Post-Script

A few months ago, Dave told me that he missed my ministry in music and asked me to go back to Worst of Sinners (our worship band). I joyfully obliged! What a sweet, sweet Savior to love me so dearly as to bring softening to my hard heart and correction to my waywardness. I love Him so…

Legacy - part 2

Event #2. Stepping down from music ministry.

God was softening my heart to receive His admonishment. The conviction of the Holy Spirit led me to confession and repentance, like a trowel breaking up the hardened soil of my heart. The ever-gracious Gardener began to pull weeds of wrong thinking. I realized that throughout my whole marriage I had looked at my roles as separate from my husbands. With the exception of raising our children, every other role I operated in a sphere apart from Dave. Oh, I tried to never do anything without his OK, but once he would give me the green light, I took the map and the wheel and drove the course at my own pace (which was usually full speed ahead)! We had our marriage and our family, he had his careers, and I had my ministries. Now the Lord was wresting from me those desires and replacing them with a reformation! He planted in me the desire to make my family, especially my ministry to Dave, my first priority. I needed to learn what it meant to live as a CONSTANT help-meet to my husband. I needed to practice not having any other plans or motivations other than living in unity with my husband. Where previously our marriage had been a tag-team relay, not it was a three-legged race. So, I cut off a leg! In an effort to make “the big gesture” to Dave, I stepped down from the worship band. When I wrote, “I cut off my leg”, that was not just an erudite device. Music has always been one of my greatest loves. I thank God for the talent He has given me, the training He was so gracious to allow, and the great joy and pleasure it brings me.

I knew that I would miss the joy of music, worship, rehearsal, and discipline. I knew that I would miss the fellowship of my brothers and sisters, working in sweet communion with the Father. I would miss hearing how God was blessing and stretching them. I would miss the privilege of carrying their burdens to the throne, of walking with them through the valleys and enjoying the vistas of God’s goodness lavished upon them. They were family! But I would sacrifice this for the benefit of being conformed to the image of Jesus. To walk this portion of my journey in solitude and silence, submitting to the will of the Father, with the hope of His promises blossoming in our marriage.

Dave’s reaction wasn’t what I had hoped for. He didn’t jump for joy. He knew how much I would miss my musical and ministry outlet. But he recognized my motivation and was anxious to see what God would do with it.

Now the hard part began. Living with the decisions to obey God and to sacrifice… It is one thing to make a commitment and state your resolve in the moment of conviction and passion, but after the campers have sung “kumbaya”, and stamped out the campfire, all you are left with is smoke and echoes. The hours, days, and months after were hard and lonely ones. Days previously filled with researching, studying, teaching, rehearsing being surrounded by people, and being on stage, were now strangely silent and still. This left space to hear the doubts, depression, apathy, and sorrow percolate in my heart. I felt naked. Stripped of the identity that I had built. Who was I honestly to God? What did He create me to be? The Spirit kept pressing upon me my position as help-meet, the unity and oneness of marriage, and how foreign this all was to me on a practical level. How do I complete Dave tangibly? How does our marriage show to the world a picture of Christ and the church? First I had to know Dave better. I had to do more than just say at dinner, “Honey, please pass the salad dressing, and how was your day today?” I had to learn to anticipate his needs on a deeper scale. There was something more (than just knowing he wants his ice cream a little melted) to this idea of truly knowing and serving somebody.

As I began the hard process of stilling myself to listen quietly to the Lord and His Word, He began to give me ideas, and new levels of interest in Dave’s life. Things that previously, I wished he would have left at work, now, I cared about. I began to pray him though his day. I found myself wondering what he was doing, and how he would handle a certain situation (I imagined would happen) in the course of a normal day. Instead of a list of things I needed to get done in the course of a day, now I was making lists of things that I believed would help Dave.

In regards to my portion in leading worship, I have always known how inconsequential it was in the macrocosm of things, and yet, I had made it an idol in my heart. This was such an uncomfortable place to be in, yet my desire was to find my joy in Christ alone and love to love my husband and family with the first fruits of my love, not the leftovers. With the help of Christ my Savior, I will continue the process of daily dying to myself and living to, and for, and in Christ.

Legacy - Part 1

The journey that God has led our family on these past two years has been remarkable. I pen this account to my children as a legacy of God’s goodness and sovereign work in our family, and my life in particular. I pray this serves as a reminder to them to walk humbly and circumspectly with God, and to follow Him even in the things that don’t cohere to conventional wisdom. After all, God is anything but conventional or predictable.

There were many changes, decisions, or events that I could mention, but I want to track the hand of God on our family in three very personal events. Event #1: I stepped down from a women’s bible study teaching ministry. Event # 2: I stepped down from worship ministry with Worst of Sinners. Event #3: After 20 years of home schooling, we enrolled our last two children in a traditional school.

Looking at this on paper, various and sundry conclusions could be made. Spanning the spectrum from the cynical - “There is obviously some serious backsliding going on in that family!”, to the mundane - “It’s probably a mid-life crisis.”, all the way to the glib - “I wonder if they won the lottery and are planning to travel the world (without their kids)?” In any event, the facts do not tell the story. So here it is.

Event number #1 came about as a result of several long lessons hammered on my heart from the Word of God, applied by the Spirit. First, I began to notice a weakness in the arena of women’s ministry. (I know I am seriously rocking the boat here, and will never be asked to join women’s ministry, or teach at a women’s retreat again, but here it is.) From my perspective, the church and para-church organizations are busy equipping women by giving them knowledge in doctrine and theology. Lots of money in Christendom is being spent developing curricula for women. After all, there is a huge market for it. Churches spend large portions of their budgets on Women’s ministry. It is considered vital to the health and strength of a church. I will not argue that point. But what I began to observe, and experience through many counseling opportunities that teaching afforded, was that this “biblical workout” was producing women (myself included) who were in better “shape” than their husbands.

I could see two potential results of this. One was that men would stop stepping up to the plate of spiritual leadership. With the confidence and growth in spiritual knowledge, their female counterparts would be more than willing to teach and counsel, and in my experience (not a bash on men, really!), men tend to take the path of least resistance. So, if a woman volunteered to teach a class or bible study, then that’s one less thing they would have to do! The other was, that all of this biblical knowledge and spiritual wisdom has the potential to puff up.

What I witnessed in some of our bible studies was that some women would go home and try to teach their husbands the things they learned. Others would wield their knowledge to gain the upper hand in an argument, or to control or manipulate a desirous outcome. In both cases, the woman was subtly usurping the man’s position in the marriage. This became so clear to me, as I was walking in late to a Sunday school class and overheard someone say, “Too bad Kari is not here, she would know the answer to that!” At that moment I was struck with two very opposing thoughts. One born from arrogance and pride; and the other, from the Spirit, was an overwhelming sense of shame and sorrow. You see, my husband was sitting in the room I was about to enter. It was heartbreaking to me that people would value my input in a biblical matter above my husbands, who is my spiritual head!

I was immediately convicted that I had overstepped my spiritual bounds. I had always stressed to the women in my bible studies, the importance of learning from their husbands, biblical things. I had challenged them regularly to take what I said and ask their husbands if it was truth. I had even stated, on many occasions, “Believe what your husband tells you, wherever it contradicts what I say”. But there was a great disparity between what I said occasionally and what was actually happening.

From my first bible study until now, I had always felt the weight of responsibility in teaching God’s Word. I took the responsibility and privilege very seriously. One of the verses I often preached to myself was Mark 9:42, “And whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in Me to stumble, it would be better for him if a millstone were hung around his neck, and he were thrown into the sea.” Yet now I wonder if that sense of heaviness was the Holy Spirit’s warning, which I was either ignoring or downplaying to just a, “be careful!”

Later my Greek teacher challenged me with another look at a passage I had taught to women many times before, Titus 2:3-5. I knew the passage well, but what he pointed out was not some nuance in the Greek, or obscure meaning of a word, but rather what was NOT in the list of things older women should be teaching younger women…doctrine. According to God, (explained through Paul to Titus) older women are to teach how to live out, put on, or apply this list of things. For my analytical, slightly OCD mind, this is a stretch. I can break down a passage, (how adroitly is not the issue) unpack it, put it in context, show how it relates to other passages, but restricting myself to just focusing on teaching how to love their husbands…to live out love, practically, moment by moment… I realized that I hadn’t focused on that in my marriage. So, I ended that semester of teaching. Gathered my leadership team together and told them that I could not, in good conscience, continue leading or teaching.

I have given up things in my life that have been truly a sacrifice before. I am familiar with the struggle of flesh and spirit, doing what you don’t want to do, and not doing what you want to do. I am keenly aware of my sacrifice being a mixed bag of motives… But this was one of the hardest things for me to give up, to date.

Woodcutters and Water Carriers

"Then the men of Israel took some of their provisions; but they did not ask counsel of the Lord. So Joshua made peace with them..." Joshua 9:14

Living in this physical, tangible world, I pride myself at times, on being decisive and pragmatic. I can calculate the best course of action and make the most logical and practical response. How very like Joshua I am. I imagine he was just starting to feel comfortable with this whole taking-over-for-Moses, leading-the-nation thing. He was developing a cadence. Hitting his stride.

He led them across the Jordan successfully, had them build a memorial, circumcised the entire nation, conquered Jericho, purged them of the disobedient ones, and defeated Ai in brilliant military prowess. He's probably thinking, "I got this!" Or, at least, "I think I'm getting the hang of this!"

And then... enter the Gibeonites. Joshua listens to their story, sees their clothes and provisions, and makes the obvious, logical move. That was easy. But in the passage, there is that one quiet, nagging phrase. "...but they did not ask counsel of the Lord."

It's the punch in the gut. How many times can that little phrase be inserted in the narrative of my life? Way too many, it saddens me to admit. I am so dependant upon my abilities or, so impatient to get going, that I'll figure it out on the fly. And then God-in His love for me-throws a curve. Yes, deceit and manipulation are a part of fallen man's DNA, but what I forget is that God uses even wickedness to bring my focus back to Him. God, in His faithfulness, keeps me tethered to Him, just like He did Joshua.

I have so many woodcutters and water carriers in my life as reminders of God's faithfulness and my rashness. The Lord reminded me of them again this morning.

Living in the Fairy Tale

I was reading in Joshua this morning about the Israelites taking/destroying Jericho (Joshua 6). It was interesting to me that Joshua gave instructions to the two spies (who had taken refuge with Rahab the harlot) the task of finding and delivering Rahab and her relatives safely out of the city. I imagine the pandemonium and destruction. The passage says the Israelites killed every man, woman, and child in Jericho…EXCEPT…Rahab and her family. What an astounding task, the task of deliverance, of rescue, bestowed upon the two faithful spies. Their first trip into the city, they were the targets, they were the hunted at risk, they were the messengers of destruction, who were given refuge by God in the home of Rahab. On this return trip, they enter with the hunters, but they are spared the task of destruction, and given the mission of rescue and deliverance. What a beautiful and precious picture of mercy and salvation against the backdrop of bloodshed and violence! But without the background, would the focal point be as resplendent and striking?

The circle of the remnant desolating completely, yet rescuing a remnant, is complete. What a beautiful, full of mercy, God-thing!!! God has always done this. Adam and Eve, Noah and the flood, Abraham and the Chaledeans, Isaac on the altar, Joseph in Egypt, Elijah against the prophets of Baal, Lot and Sodom and Gomorrah, and the list goes on.

The whole world is Jericho. God has pronounced His judgment and all are condemned…EXCEPT for those who respond to Jesus’ knock and open the door. To those, Jesus has made and completed, a plan of deliverance. These will be rescued and become a part of His holy nation, His royal family.

I long for Rahab’s faith! The spies gave their word, but the waiting must have seemed interminable!! I wonder if she was able to walk through the market and gaze into the faces of her friends and aquaintences and see them as walking dead men and women? Did her heart break for them? Did she solicite everyone she could to come be a part of her family of delivered ones? Or had she lost hope, presuming that her present was reality, and her future was merely a fairy tale?


Oh God, give me eyes to see my neighbors as about-to-be dead men, and give me a heart that desperately wants to see You deliver them!!! Use me to do it, if You so desire.