Have you ever been sucker-punched by the Holy Spirit? Today, I received another one of those “blows”. I was in the middle of praying for my kids, asking God to overwhelm them and consume their hearts and lives. I was on the verge of asking God to use them in incredible ways for His kingdom, when I felt it. You know, the feeling when you’re cruising along in a car and the driver slams on the brakes. Yep, I felt it. That quiet, unsettling question; “Why incredible ways?”
I wanted my kids to do great things for God. To have amazing, heroic, world-changer lives. I have raised them for that. But...why?
Is it pride? Is it legacy? What was my motive in this request on behalf of my kids? I know one thing for sure. My motives were not purely for the purpose of God being highly exalted. It was my kids being highly exalted, and lets face it-me.
So how do I pray for my kids, besides the obvious? It’s a hard prayer for me! Really. I pray that God would make them small. Make them microscopically small. I pray that they would be weak, empty, and small. It almost seems unloving. It is definitely unnatural.
Truth be told, it is what I desire for myself, but my flesh is constantly at war with this attitude. The desire to be the best bible study leader, the best mother, the best wife, the best Greek student, the best.....all for the glory of God (I tell myself). But strip down the rhetoric and that attitude is pride. Why do I not strive to be insignificant so Christ can be seen more clearly?
2 comments:
Small and simple - life is better there, but we are always reaching for big and complex. It really makes no sense!
Great post!
Hello there!!! Stumbled across your blog while looking for a picture of a gavel for my church. That was random enough to share.
Anyway, I read through this post and really enjoyed it. I do not have kids of my own, yet, but I have many that I pray for, and you are right...I really need to reevaluate my prayers. Pray for humbleness, for obedience to God's will in their lives, for a life sold-out but not necessarily meaning they will be great and fantastic in the world's eyes, just devoted.
Amen sister!
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